Jealousy, insecurity, possessiveness and controlling behaviour ( such as of our time, friends, and who we speak to or see)......is not Love.

When someone makes demands upon your time that you end up isolating from all you care about and need ...... that's not Love.

It's unrealistic to think all you need is (so & so)- it isn't love, it's being possessive (that's not love).   No one person should be responsible for filling someone else's emotional and physical needs..... That's not Love.

Isolation, name-calling and blame is not love. (for example: when you go out to see friends you are a whore).

To be hit because you talked to your family or friends.  Nobody needs permission to do these things .  That's not love ,that's just an attempt to isolate you so that you depend only on him or her that's unrealistic and unhealthy..... That's not Love.

When someone says "You never" or "You always" in trying to place blame.   Is not love.   There are no totals in life like that there is only "sometimes".   This is just another attempt at control.

When someone hurts things smaller than them or pushes and/or verbally abuses in a cruel manner....that's not love.   It can be a way to exert control by bad behaviour.    Cruelty to pets is not love.

Interrogation, name-calling, sleep deprivation, threats of bodily harm...is not love.

Such things as "Don't make me have to hit you" and "If you just would have listened .. maybe I wouldn't have had to "hit" (or whatever other abuse or bad behaviour)...is not love.

Breaking things and throwing fits of anger in the name of love is not love. "Look what you made me do".   Everyone is responsible for their own actions.   I can't stress this enough.

Physically restraining while having differences of opinion ("Listen or else") any physical holding like this ....is not love.

Explosive tempers, hypersensitivity, blame, verbal or physical assaults, belittling, or simply not giving credit for any accomplishments .....is not love.

In what we do or fail to do, we are accountable for our actions.   We should treat everyone as we want to be treated, as love does not hurt, make you feel pain and shame.   Love doesn't leave bruises or scars or destroy emotions and feelings.

LOVE FEELS GOOD !! 

Love is a lightness in the heart and a connection in the soul to others.   I think we all really know when something doesn't feel right and hurts.... 
That's not Love.

If anyone shows or recognises any of the negative signs above that I have spoken about it's called ABUSE.   I know, I'm a survivor.  You can get away. Talk, scream if you need to ~ but GET OUT! 

There is help out there....we need not live in fear any more, people are becoming aware.

DON'T HIDE ABUSE ANY LONGER .   THIS IS HOW IT SURVIVES AND CONTINUES.    FACE IT AND GET HELP !!
 

"Love believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things ~
Love NEVER fails."
~ 1 Corinthians 13:13 ~


Back to Abuse home page What is Abuse? What is Domestic Abuse? Come and read my own story....
Come and read some poems about domestic and other abuse etc. This is what Love is.... Read what love ISN'T! These are your Bill of Rights...Please read them!!
Different types of abuse (page not complete).... Do you recognise these syptoms? The Cycle of Abuse, and the pattern of behaviour..... Myths about abuse and the abuser......
The Twelve signs of the abuser Read the reasons WHY victims stay with their abusive partners.... Come see my Survivor Awards and Gifts for raising awareness.... Apply for my gifts for Survivors and related sites......
Join the Victims by Chance, Survivors by Choice eGroup! NEW!!  Join my Abuse Webring! DV Webrings I am a member of.... Abuse and Survivor Links

Please Sign my Guestbook

Please sign my Survivor's Guestbook and share with me

Please Sign My Survivor's Guestbook View my Survivor's Guestbook

Send me an E-mail!
 

©  Graphics on this site remain in the property of their owners
and where credit is given.
Thanks to Donna from
"Graphics by Donna" for the border
When I saw this image, I saw myself and how I felt
when I was a victim of abuse

1