Here's a condom for you. You pretend that you don't want it.
But you need it, yes, you do. Take it. There.
Now read what's written on the silvery surface of the wrapper.
It's a language you don't know, and yet you like it, for you know
That the text is meant for you.
Who knows, but it may even be about you
Or was written with you in mind.
Open it. Without false humility. It's all yours,
You may do with it what you like. There.
Put it to your lips now. No, no, to your lips, that's right,
Your lips. And if you cannot, just like that,
Close your eyes and but imagine
It's a swatch of perfumed silk held in your hand,
Better yet, an ox-eye daisy, which you want to kiss.
Blow now, yes, blow, blow. Slowly, wait until the breath
Takes everything away that has accumulated, out of you. There,
Watch it grow. Now blow harder. See how big it has become?
Do you like it? That's enough now. It might spread
Into all the space there is, squeeze you up against the wall
And crush you. That's enough, I said. It's time
That you tied it. Like s-o-o-o-o. Now it's truly
Only yours, yours to do with what you like.
Aha, I see you've taken the red lipstick
And begun to draw on the condom. Drawn a dot,
And then another. And a laughing line underneath.
Now I get it: it is me you want to draw,
Wanting to become my master, yet you haven't quite,
Quite caught me and now you're angry. You're furious.
But, hey, what's this? You notice that behind my smile,
That is, there,where besides your own expired breath there's nothing,
There is something. You know full well that that's impossible, still
The feeling will not go away. Indeed,
You're more and more sure of it and troubled. You have the feeling
You are lost and lost in a dark wood,
Or that you can no longer move your limbs.
You hate yourself like that, and so you lean your ear against the lips
You drew for me, and listen all you can.
The breath that you so willingly expended, you're suddenly out of.
Terrified you listen closely one more time. And now
There is no longer any doubt. In the emptiness of the condom
Somebody's there, and you know damn well that
Where there's nobody there, there can only be God.
Breathlessly, you move away, something like that you never
Expected, never mind foresaw, and only now
Are you really furious. Worse: crazy with fear is what you are,
Since you no longer are convinced that in a moment,
When you pull the blade out and slowly and deeply
Pierce me, I will really disappear forever.